Early today, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (Mormon) lost a longtime leader, namely Jeffrey R. Holland, who until his death, caused by kidney disease, served as the president of the church’s so-called Quorum of The Twelve Apostles, ending a 31-year run as what the church thinks is an apostle. Those of us who are not retarded know that nothing about the church is apostolic. It was all made up by a teenage boy with a wild imagination.
Though he was likely mentally ill for thinking he was truly an apostle of Jesus Christ, one does have to admire the fact that he dedicated his adult life to service within his religion. Holland was quickly replaced today, a lot faster than usual, likely due to the fact that he was essentially useless in his later years.
President Henry B. Eyring, first counselor in the First Presidency is now the president of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles. However, he cannot effectively serve in the First Presidency and the quorum at the same time. Accordingly, President Dieter F. Uchtdorf will graduate to the role of the quorum’s acting president.
Just like any other organization, the church does have its chain of command and its procedures. Now that Uchtdorf is in command of the quorum, people move up in the food chain.
When the current president of the church, President Dallin H. Oaks (or Dallas H. Oaks, depending upon who you ask), dies, President Henry B. Eyring will assume control. By that time, things will go from bad to worse.
This means that there will one day soon be bad news for the church’s over 18 million members. When Eyring dies, whether that be near or far in the future, the next president of the church (a so-called “prophet”) will be none other than a slimeball named David A. Bednar.
I had a run-in a long time ago with Bednar when he visited the area in which I once lived. He caught me sleeping in the third row while another church authority was speaking. He got up out of his seat and looked as if he was going to pounce on me. Not exactly the Christlike example that a so-called “apostle” should be showing, right?
Bednar is arrogant beyond belief and has a rather high opinion of himself, an opinion that is most certainly unwarranted. It makes me glad that I am no longer a member of that church, having left it for Catholicism. When Bednar does take over, it will be frightening and amusing at the same time to see what he does.
Uchtdorf, a former airline pilot, is 85. If recent performance is any indication, he has at least ten years left in him, which means that Bednar could assume the proverbial throne somewhere around 2035. Bednar is 73, so when he takes over, he will unfortunately have plenty of fight left in him.
This is the doomsday scenario that I feared as a member. Now, as a former member, I am already preparing the popcorn. Things are about to get quite interesting almost immediately. With Uchtdorf taking the helm of the quorum, he will no doubt be making sweeping changes just as soon as his access badge is updated.
Bednar must be gleeful right about now. I have no doubt that he’s already chosen the drapery for what will one day be his office. Yes, he is that arrogant! Now, let the hilarity ensue!